🎵 Deadpool Recap Rap // by The Warp Zone

5 ContributorsDeadpool Recap Rap Lyrics [Verse 1] An origin story mostly told through flashbacks Brought to you by overpaid tools and asshats The Wolverine blueprint with a slightly different pattern Multiply the violence, add the fuckin' Green Lantern But you can call him Wade Wilson now Pizza munching, minor hugging merc with a mouth Never stops talking, tequila shot knocking Back at St. Margaret's with Erlich Bachman His only friend until he meets Vanessa They spend a year doing it and playing dress-up So beautiful and kinky, the proposal with the ring pop Everything's cool 'til cancer throws everything off The cure's inside a fucked-up institution That tortures him until he turns into a mutant Like Ajax (Francis), either way, insidious Turns a perfect idiot real fuckin' hideous He burns the place down, revenge is in his balls He needs to break something (Oh hey, fourth wall) [Chorus 1] Just call me Deadpool from the movie, Deadpool So tongue in cheek you won't believe it, baby Just like this chorus, it's from the movie (Get it?) [Verse 2] Now he's on a warpath to find and kill Francis Who just disappeared, so the only real plan is To scour the city and fuck up the cronies With katanas, guns, and fuckin' zambonis Back to the freeway, you ready for some cool shit? He takes down a whole gang with only 12 bullets Fucks up Francis, gets him where he wants him But is suddenly interrupted by a metally buff Russian "Recruiting for X-Men" Wade declines the option Then punches stuff, gets cuffed, pulls an Aron Ralston Down in the dumps, as he grows a tiny baby hand Builds up a Kullen with his old blind lady friend Pining for Vanessa, wants to tell her the truth But all of a sudden talking is a hard thing to do Fund her at her club starring DJ Excelsior Follow her out back, but, whoops! she ain't there no more Motherfucker, cock jiggling Jiminy fuck-face Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck (I mean) [Chorus 2] Just call me Deadpool from the movie, Deadpool Raked in more cash than every X-Men movie This is it for singing, now enjoy the ending [Verse 3] He needs all the guns, stuff 'em in a duffle bag 3,000 rounds packed, one of 'em's a People mag Dopinder's back, (high five!) pile into his yellow cab Slow motion, badass, whoops, left the duffel bag Oh well, he's going all swords, no lead Nothing compares to Negasonic Teenage Warhead Colossus fights clean does his gentleman best While Wade slices kneecaps and hacks heads off necks Francis faceoff, no sign of stopping That is until he takes a fuckin' knife to the noggin Vanessa saves him and the building crashes down Everybody survives ("I'm gonna kill Francis now") "Wait, perhaps first you'd like advice from Colossus 4 or 5 moments that's all it–" Mask removal, show the human blood blister She don't seem to care, they make out to Careless Whisper Sequel's being written, but nothing is a given All I know is poor Dop's def going to prison